Talking to your teen about ADHD

The phrase "surviving the teenage years" wasn't authored without good reason. Can a teen with ADHD make this period of time more challenging? More dramatic? More turbulent? Of course, so it's important for parents to step back every once in a while to review what types of communication have worked, and what types haven't. It also never hurts to ask your family just to take a moment to visualise or imagine what having ADHD might feel like, sound like, or look like for your teen. This practice can make a huge difference in relating and communicating.

"Mum, does ADHD make me cool or uncool?"

For starters, many teens find their identity, or image, in ADHD. It shapes their view of the world. It may give them either a "cool" or "uncool" persona among their own social group. For better or worse, many teens see themselves through their ADHD. But as a parent, you are most likely more concerned with the ways ADHD affects your teen's academic life, family relationships, and the household in general. This is why your teen's ADHD and treatment plan should be discussed - honestly and often.

Strategies to help you and your teen see eye-to-eye (for the most part)

Here are some strategies that can help you inspire a more productive relationship with your teen:

• Make sure your teen understands the true nature of ADHD; that it's a medical condition, not a label, and it's something that needs to be treated-just like poor vision or diabetes.
• Highlight what your teen has accomplished over time, even with ADHD, and make positive statements about the improvements you and others have noticed.
• Consider enrolling in group therapy. Interactions among other teens with ADHD, who are of the same age and same gender, may be very helpful.
• Set realistic goals for family interaction. With any teenager, you're bound to have slammed doors, crying spells, and the questioning of authority. When ADHD is present, these episodes may be more frequent or intense. Manage your expectations, but always set (and maintain) household rules.
• Many teens with ADHD may not want to continue their medication. Medications designed to treat the symptoms of ADHD may also affect, as teens would argue, "who they really are." It's not only wise to anticipate this argument ahead of time, but to also prepare solid reasons for why consistency is critical to successful ADHD treatment.